Tween thoughts have me in knots

    Despite the high hopes of a new year, twentytwelve (on the face of it) is a bit like twentyeleven: we're not in the noughts and we're not yet in the teens — the numbers 11 and 12, reside in neither lot.

   In that regard, 11 and 12 are somewhat funky numbers aren't they? Why aren't they called oneteen and twoteen? Probably has something to do with the Twelve Tribes.

   As 2011 lurched toward its exit, a flurry of knuckle sandwiches and weaponry broke out at a fistful of überurban shoe stores and subüberurban malls.
    It appears Nike's Phil Knight and Michael Jordan (embracing the seamy reality of modern capitalism) cannot amass enough money or publicity. Their must have Christmas bait was a pair of very expensive sneakers which brought out the worst from some of the most underprivileged.
   Not exactly the Christmas tableau that has been traditional in the US and a very sad commentary on the branding scourge that can whip our youngsters into such animalistic behavior.
   And all over a pair of shoes.

Birdsong Motel, Treasure Island, Florida

   In other gnus, or if you're gnu here, here's a smattering of smarmy highlights found on this here blog spot in 2011:
   There was a brief mention of the flagrant conspiracy against thin people; whether we have become a nation of wusses; when there may be wholesale revolution in China; CNN's continuing embrace of sleaze; and an introduction to the Zimmerman Lapse Phenomenon.
   The year wasn't the best to be Martin Sheen and if only Muammar Gaddafi had heeded my call [let's just say the political stage is a lot less stylish without him or Silvio to kick around anymore].

   Speaking of fashion, 2011 saw the flame-out of one of fashion's most celebrated fops; Japanese women going toe-to-toe against the world; and a ten-year look back to Sept, 11, 2001 (where were you?).

   The year was not free of personal heartburn, generated primarily by the likes of Sir Paul McCartney; Rick Perry; Courtney Love; Walmart; and, naturally, Chinese buffets.
  But, again, I have never been happier to see a year in the rear as 2011, and sincerely hope all of you who are either gnu [or who have long weathered these screeds] to have a happy, healthy, prosperous 2012.
   It simply has to be better than 'oneteen.'
   (Oh, and to be on the safe side, better keep and eye on Dec. 21.)
   editor's note: On Aug. 20, 2012, Nike [incredibly] announced plans for a $315 pair of sneakers, blaming the cost of cotton and southeast Asian labor for the price tag.